Thursday: Day of Return

The Real Me

             At school, i'm the normal, quiet, shy, and smart girl who is heartless.  In reality, i'm the nerdy, loud, emotional, and typical teenager, the version of me nobody is able to see.  I'm able to conceal my emotions in order to keep in the secrets concealed inside of me.  Sometimes its too much for me to keep inside, which is why i created this blog.  However, no matter how many times i say the truth, you will never know who i am.  I'm just another person in the world, just another New Yorker. 

The Day of Return

Things are pretty tough in New York right now.  When winter comes in, the germs and viruses inside the bodies around me leak around the breathable air... gross!  So, due to the contamination and the pathogen inside my body, I want able to go to school for three long days.  Don't get me wrong, i love school, but those days were the best three of my life.  

The day i finally return from school, i am soothed by my "rival's" constant attempts to hit on the Lonely Boy,  the only guy I've ever liked.  My school life is like a never ending roller coaster.  And yes, there are characters in this story.

There EB, aka Perfect Girl: Dark brown/blonde hair, perfect teeth, lips, and the most beautiful "white girl" in the eyes of many, including myself. 

She and I are friends but we sort of aren't.  She's a cool and supportive person, but i just know in my gut that she hates me (and soon you'll know why)

Lonely Boy, whose really not so lonely.  In fact, he has many friends.  He's cute, funny, and has freckles.  I don't really care about his appearance, he is a good listener, courageous and he's honest.  i guess i can call him Dream Guy.  He has two adorable little sisters, who i love and care for.  He is basically just an amazing person.

Lastly, we have me.  I have dark brown hair, but some sections are lighter that the others.  I'm not perfect in appearance or personality, i'm just me AKA LG 




Back to my story, i was pretty sick and absent for three days.  PG, Lonely Boy, and I have a "love triangle".  PG says she doesn't like him but its completely obvious she does.  PG used to live in another state, and is madly in love with this other guy (whose name i will not say), but she still hangs on to lonely boy.  It was lunch time, I was running to buy a cupcake for my friends, which made me late.  Almost all seats were taken, except the one between PG and Lonely Boy.  When i asked her to move over, she said "there isn't enough space... go sit over there"  I did, without any space at all, i was forced to lean over the tip of the seat.  And right in my view there was PG getting flirty with Lonely boy( with the help of her best friend).  I would hate her if i could, but she's my friend and my competitor.  And she likes him,  but he and I ..ugh.... i hate talking about my feelings.  
Usually i sit next to him and talk to him because he just understand me.  We talk about cars, video games, our lives, and everything else.  But it seems as if he likes both of us.  
Your probably wondering why i haven't told him how i felt.  About a year ago, i started developing these feelings, and somebody started putting the puzzle together.  I received an anonymous letter, saying that if i were to say something, my  secret would be revealed( one of the secrets i will not share).  I didn't say anything,  trying to convince my friends that we're (he and I) just friends.  So far nobody except the person who sent the letter knows the truth.  Honestly, the letter isn't the only reason i haven't told.    I'm afraid.  I don't have a good history with love and fantasy, and i feel like if he knew, everything (including our friendship which i cherish) would be destroyed.  That's it for today.  My life won't be the only thing i will talk about.  To hear my opinion on other things, send me requests through email and check the blog.

Rights to gossip girl
Who am i, that's a secret I'll never tell.
XOXO
-LG